4 Emotional Wellness Hacks
Looking at our lifestyle now makes me realize how important our childhood experiences are. That is when most of our habits are formed and emotional states are developed. While I was growing up, I was allowed to play outside, eat mostly plant-based meals, be in nature, have friends, and also do some chores in and around the house with my siblings. I grew up with two of my brothers one immediately older and one 3 years younger than me. We ate our dinner and did our homework together. We felt free and happy as primary school children.
Recently, I attended an online webinar by Deepak Chopra, where he talked about emotions and happiness. What fascinated me was when he said that our childhood experiences set the bar for our happiness. Our happiness also influences our biological state. For example, when we are depressed, our immune system can become compromised, and we get sick easily.
Dr. Chopra explains that we develop emotional control mechanisms to obtain what we did not get as children. So what does a child want in their early developmental stage? Dr. Chopra proposes that when children do not have these four important experiences, emotional dysfunction develops, which can also cause problems in adulthood:
- Acceptance (of who they are),
- Attention (to be listened to),
- Affection (to be loved and cared for), and
- Appreciation (to be noticed and acknowledged).
The effects of not having these experiences become deeply rooted in our subconscious mind and begin to rule our adult lives. This in turn has an impact on our behavior, self worth and aspirations and may form a major cause for unhappiness. For example, a person who did not receive attention as a child will act out as an adult and want extra attention than a situation warrants. If you’ve noticed a grown up wanting a treat because they are jealous of the attention you’re giving to your child, this could stem from childhood neglect.
However, the good news is that these trauma-induced behaviors can be changed. The most important step is to recognize or accept the fact that they exist in you and that your behaviors, habits or attitudes can be changed. Sometimes a coach or close friend can gently point this out to you. Practices like mindfulness, meditation, yoga, consciously making positive choices, being in nature, and making other people happy through service can help change the mindset and lead you towards emotional wellness and genuine happiness.
If you think you could benefit from a coach or guide to help you release these patterns of behavior and hack into your emotional wellness by fulfilling any of the four key experiences you need, drop us a note. You’ll be taking a powerful and positive step towards your own emotional wellness and happiness.
