5 Tips for Getting People to do What You Want Without Asking
Last month I gave a talk at the Roseville Chambers of Commerce. It was a talk on behavioral messaging. Essentially, how to motivate others in the direction you want without explicitly asking them. The other person could be a prospect, a colleague, a direct report, a supervisor, or a client. My audience was small and diverse, representing sales, recruitment, marketing, healthcare, networking, and law. I have summarized the session I facilitated for this group in this post. You’re welcome!
- Start with who you are. Write down and know well your values, skills, and roles. Be aware of your intentions, and make sure they are ethical and practical.
- Have empathy. Find out what challenges the other person is having and put yourself in their shoes to really understand how it feels and what they need. What do they value? What do they need and how will you help them? What do you need them to do and why? How will you help them?
- Build a bridge. Build a deep connection between who you are and the other person’s pain points or challenges using your shared values. You can do this by the words you use when you speak and write to this person.
- Tap into deep motivations. When you communicate, invoke a sense of belonging to a team, doing the right thing, and show that people like them are also doing what you’d like them to do.
- Frame and facilitate. Make the desired behavior easy: streamline it for the person so they feel comfortable taking the first step. Appeal to shared meaning, values, and purpose. Keep it positive and uplifting.
If you’d like more detail on how to do this, with examples, I’d be happy to facilitate a session for you and your team, let me know!
My audience liked a lot about this session, including diversity of perspectives. Photo Credit: yours truly.
Yours truly talking about empathy and point of view. And yes, I have a lot of water! Thanks Ray! Photo Credit: Ray Fuentes.